Love for Love’s Sake - Chapter 77

Chapter 77

“Let’s go.”

There was a light tap on my shoulder when I didn’t move.

From the corner of my vision, shadows began to permeate. The sensation of everything in front collapsing had become familiar now.

[ Did you receive the hint I sent you? ]

The sentence from the email senior had sent overlapped with the system message. Then, could this also be a hint from senior?

“Then, let’s say what if, Myeongha.”

As expected, I heard senior’s voice.

My surroundings gradually plunged into darkness. At first, I thought it was complete darkness, but then I noticed a soft light ahead.

Senior and I were seated in the grandstands. Images were being projected onto a giant screen. The movie had already ended.

“Breaking up right now or hanging on, what do you think you would do?”

Movie credits were rolling on the screen. The main theme of the movie was arranged into an orchestral score, filling the theater.

“Like the movie?”

I asked back.

Although I hadn’t seen the contents of the movie, I knew what kind of movie it was.

A romance movie where the protagonist crossed dimensions to find their loved one. The main character attempted to save their lover by turning back time and space repeatedly. But they always fell short by a few seconds.

And then…how did it end?

“It’s not necessarily like the movie. Consider it as if you have a deadline.”

“Risking your life? Isn’t that too extreme?”

“Listen. You can part ways without immediate pain. It’s a beautiful way to end things.”

I leaned back in my seat and listened in silence. Senior always showed an interest in such conservations.

“There’s another option. It can be very painful, causing mutual wounds. You might regret it. But on this path, you can be with the person you love a little longer.”

“What’s the point of being together if it’s difficult?”

“The meaning of being together.”

There was a laugh. Whether it was difficult to be together or alone, wasn’t it meaningless either way?

Wasn’t it better to be lonely alone rather than struggle for someone else’s sake?

“If it were me, I would choose to part ways.”

I didn’t agonize for long.

“In your scenario we can part ways amicably. It’s not easy to break up on good terms, so wouldn’t it be best if that was guaranteed?”

“Is that so? That’s right.”

Senior never told me I was wrong, no matter what I said. That was why I could talk to senior about anything.

“It seems too difficult to cling on like that. I’d rather let go.”

When desperately clinging to anything, you were destined to fall. Some may climb back up, but not me.

“You can’t be together forever anyway, with anyone. When it’s time to part, just part ways.”

I would rather have control of my own ending. It was far better than being left behind. It was a conversation without much hesitation.

The lights in the theater went out.

After the light returned, I saw the broken concrete ground and the back of my hand. I was kneeling on the ground. I could feel Cha Yeowoon panicking and trying to help me up.

My breathing was heard very loudly. It was as if all other sounds on a blurry screen had been muted, leaving only the amplified sound of my breath.

[ !Sub-Mission triggered. ]

A cheerful melody followed my heartbeat.

[ Q. What do you want to do? ]

The question this time was very straightforward.

It was asking me. Right now.

[A.

(Face the ending 36 days from now.)

or

(Restore the remaining time to 100 days and reset Cha Yeowoon’s favorability.) ]

This time, two choices appeared in the answer section.

I read it carefully as if I was chewing and swallowing each letter.

36 days or 100 days. At most, about three months.

Reset? My brows furrowed at the incomprehensible words.

[ ※Regarding the procedure for favorability reset… ]

After reading the following content, I was dumbfounded. There was no way I could choose something like this.

To my side, Cha Yeowoon looked very serious. The one who told me he loved me, the one I liked the most.

A bitter taste rose in my mouth.

[ Can only be exchanged within the next 23:59:59 ]

The clock started moving again.

[ If no selection is made, Sub-Mission will be invalidated. ]

[ Penalty: None ]

This time, there was no penalty. It meant everything would stay the same. In other words, if I didn’t choose, the remaining time would stay at 36 days.

“What is this…”

The sound that had escaped quickly became diluted like ink dropped in water. It didn’t reach my ears at all.

Objects around me shook, making a buzzing sound. Noises like a malfunctioning machine filled my surroundings.

Cha Yeowoon was moving his lips, but I couldn’t hear anything. It seemed like my senses were slightly skewed, like gravity had disappeared only around me.

With Cha Yeowoon’s support, we entered my house. The air inside should have been warmer than outside, but it was still cold.

[ Time remaining: 36 days ]

If there were only 36 days, everything would end before the next month. Experiencing the first snowfall, exchanging Christmas presents, being together at the turn of the year–none of these would be possible.

I couldn’t do anything.

It was too fast. I knew, but…

Cha Yeowoon and I had to break up.

We couldn’t be together forever like this.

Cha Yeowoon laid me down on the blanket he had laid out, fluffed my pillow, and anxiously straightened my hair. Worries could be felt from his fingertips.

His words only sounded like a warm and comfortable hum. Inside the blanket was a weightless world where sounds had disappeared.

[ Mission: Make Cha Yeowoon happy. ]

[ Penalty: Death ]

100 days and favorability reset. Cha Yeowoon’s happiness and my death. Risking my life? I solemnly held back my grief, swallowing a bitter smile and suppressing my resentment, as if senior could hear my mockery. I was groggy, like I was drunk.

A gamble that I was sure to lose staying like this. It wasn’t even a question.

[ Countdown: 23:47:51 ]

I had the urge to stay asleep until the time passed.

Cha Yeowoon’s touch was soothing; I abandoned the pillow and leaned my head into his hand. My body moved before my thoughts.

Leaning on him, in my heart, I had betrayed that child. Resigning myself, I was prepared to break all my promises.

* * *

My eyelids felt heavy as my vision fluttered.

If I kept sleeping like this, I wouldn’t have to do anything.

Have I ever had such thoughts before?

When was it? When? When in the past…

“Why are you like this?”

My grandmother placed a cool towel on my forehead. My head, which was sticky from the heat, became much lighter. The pleasant coolness covered my temple.

“I don’t know…Maybe I caught a cold from the rain.”

“Sick because of the rain? When you were young, you hardly got sick even once.”

My grandmother was right. I had an incredibly healthy constitution, inherited from who knows where.

As a result, I didn’t have any problems working several jobs without a break. Sleep, eat, work, sometimes skipping sleep and meals to keep working.

If I returned to 29, I would probably live a similar life again.

My throat felt sore when I tried to swallow my saliva. Maybe it was because of the continuous fever that my esophagus felt swollen.

“Grandma, do you still visit fortune tellers these days?”

“What fortune teller?”

“Go visit a shaman for an exorcism or something like that.”

As if out of nowhere, the wrinkles on my grandmother’s forehead increased.

“Did you gain a third eye? Hallucinating, hearing things, ehm?”

“No. What are you talking about?”

It was technically true to call what I had experienced hallucinations and auditory hallucinations. Even in this situation, seeing my grandmother, who had become infinitely serious with the thought of having a shaman ritual performed, made me smile.

“Just. Grandma mentioned something about fortune before. How people’s lives are actually predetermined…”

No matter how hard I tried to change things, everything always returned to its trajectory. Like a pre-written script.

“I was wondering if that was true.”

There were traces of water seeping into the corners of the stained ceiling. It seemed it had leaked again this time. I had thought I would do something about it before the rainy season began, but it was already here.

“You and I are different.”

My grandmother lightly tapped my chest.

“All the hardships I’ve experienced, in fact, were things I had to go through, and I thought that way because it was comforting. You can just believe what you want to believe.”

Similar to when my grandmother used to comfort me when I couldn’t sleep during my childhood, she adjusted the blanket and patted my chest.

“Your world is what you believe it to be. No matter what others believe, don’t be discouraged and just live the way you want.”

It felt like I had returned to the time as a child when I didn’t know how to run and kept falling.

How nice would it be? If I could just stay like this.

* * *

Despite a good night’s sleep, I still felt chilly. I slept so much that my eyes had become swollen.

In the afternoon, Cha Yeowoon came to my house and handed me a plastic bag as soon as he saw me.

“I brought porridge on my way. Fever relievers too.”

Cha Yeowoon’s outerwear, which he had taken off and hung on the wall, was slightly wet.

“Is it raining outside?”

“A little.”

“You were training in the rain?”

“Yes. I wasn’t going to, but I just did it.”

Cha Yeowoon unfolded a portable table and took out a bowl of porridge.

“I thought not going might upset senior, who thought I skipped because you were sick.”

“Worried about getting scolded?”

“No. You’re sick and I don’t want you worrying about me.”

While talking, Cha Yeowoon busily propped up a pillow behind my back for me to sit and eat comfortably.

“It’s just a minor cold, but I feel like I’m a patient who falls at the slightest tap.”

“You said you rarely got sick. Say ah.”

“…Don’t tell me you want to feed me yourself, Cha Yeowoon.”

“Ah.”

“My hands are fine.”

“Right now, senior shouldn’t lift anything heavier than a spoon.”

“But it’s just a spoon.”

“It’s a bit heavy.”

Plastic was heavy? Even when I stared at Cha Yeowoon, he was surprisingly brazen. Undaunted, he calmly pushed the porridge toward my mouth.

“You have to eat a lot to get better quickly.”

“Are you speaking informally?”

“I’m talking to myself. I won’t leave until you finish this.”

“Who said I wouldn’t eat it? I only said I would eat it myself. Ridiculous.”

Seeing Cha Yeowoon just waiting with a spoon in hand and not answering, I gave up trying to resist and opened my mouth. I had lost.

“You’re eating well.”

“…”

“Does the seasoning suit your taste? There’s soy sauce too.”

“It’s delicious.”

It was awkward, but it tasted good, despite it being ordinary porridge sold outside. Cha Yeowoon nodded proudly. Somehow, the taste of the remaining porridge in my mouth became more savory.

“Senior looks really young right now.”

“Because of my swollen eyes?”

“That too. You look so young and gentle.”

“This is the first time in my life that someone has told me I look gentle. Usually, people say I look like I have a criminal record.”

Perhaps the reason people around me didn’t acknowledge me when I went out into society was due to the impression I gave. Because of my misunderstood appearance, rumors always seemed to follow me from one part-time job to another.

I was used to the whispers and glances. The sympathetic eyes fretting over not being able to feed me porridge was unfamiliar and awkward.

“I don’t think I need to take the medicine. I don’t have a fever anymore.”

“Let me see.”

I thought Cha Yeowoon would touch my forehead with his hand, but his face suddenly drew near. Our foreheads touched, and his dense eyelashes fluttered up and down.

There was a warm exhalation. Surprisingly, his breath smelled good.

“I’m disappointed.”